From Hippos to Heroes

We went on Safari last weekend. It was an amazing adventure. We saw giraffes, crocodiles, wart hogs (our guide called them Pumba’s like the Lion King), water buffalos, many birds, monkeys, baboons, and hippopotami (our guide called them Hypobopdomysises).

The baboon came up to us. His little butt looked as red as my brother Rocky’s butt after 6 week grades are posted. He was friendly baboon. We also got to be within a few feet of the giraffe. They are very elegant animals.

While we were on the shoreline watching the hippos come in and out of the water, a crocodile dove in the water not 20 feet from us. Our guide didn’t even bat an eye. He suggested that we move in closer. We democratically voted, and stayed in our location. The vote was something like 6 for staying away, 1 for moving closer. The guide voted to move closer.

We stayed in very nice lodge. There was even running water, right out in the middle of the savannah. When the music played from time to time, I would do some tribal dancing to entertain the guests. For some reason, there were not enough locals to do this dancing, so I had to do it myself. I also two stepped with one African girl. She said it was her first time to two step, and she thought that I was really good at it. In actuality, I am terrible; however, I told her that I was performing the dance exactly how it is to be done. If another young Texas boy comes to Rwanda and dances with her, I imagine that she will tell him, “You are not doing it right. A Texan named Blaze showed me the correct way!”

That’s how things are around here. I may not always do things the best way or the correct way, but I just tell everyone that it is the best or is correct. They don’t know any different. I am a hero down here due to ignorance. I guess that is how most heroes are formed anyway. Some of my heroes when I was young haven't turned out so well. It was my ignorance that made them heroes.

Tom Cruise: Turns out he is weird and maybe even bats for the other team....

Captain Crunch: He can only be found on cereal boxes. Although he almost made his way back into my hero book when Crunch Berry’s came out.

Zach Morris from Saved by the Bell: Is he even alive now? I guess he graduated.

John Madden: I lost faith in him when I was in the fifth grade and my vocabulary became larger than his...boom!

Hungry Hungry Hippos: They lost appeal after seeing real Hippos in the wild last week.

Harvey Wellman: I used to think he founded Wellman, TX, but then I found out he was just a coach when Wellman played 8 man football....ok, he’s a small town Hero.

Mr. Moon of McDonalds: Wait, Actually, Mr. Moon is still my hero!

I know I won’t be a hero in Butare Rwanda forever, but I am for now. At least until some other Texan shows up and tries to teach them the two step. Then I might as well be one of my past heroes listed above. Well as they say in Rwanda. “....*#&$(^^^$ART^%*...” To pronounce it just do a few clicks and slurps.

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Blaze “The Two Step Texan”- Real Rwandan Hero